Why I cried:  the season 9 premiere gives us not one, not two but the three heaviest players in Biggest Loser history.  The 11 couples are also the sickest bunch to date.   At this rate, we’re bound to see a 600 lbs player on Season 10.

MEET THE TEAMS

Bob and Jillian phone each team at home to tell them they’ve made the cut for Season 9!  Team colors are selected for each pair, then the trainers throw the first curve.   The teams have to do the first weigh in before their family and friends, in public!  I am personally horrified.  It takes a lot of courage to strip down in front of EVERYONE you know.  I don’t even like getting on the scale in front of myself!

More info on Red, Pink, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Purple, Brown, Black, Gray and White Teams.

Starting weights:

• Cheryl (Mother), 247 lbs
• Daris (Son), 346 lbs
• Patti (Mother), 243 lbs
  
• Stephanie (Daughter), 264 lbs
• John (Identical Twin), 484 lbs
  
• James (Identical Twin), 485 lbs
• Sherry (Mother), 218 lbs
  
• Ashley (Daughter), 374 lbs
• Darrell (Father), 419 lbs
• Andrea “Drea” (Daughter), 238 lbs
• Cherita (Mother), 277 lbs
  
• Victoria (Daughter), 358 lbs
• Miggy (Mother), 240 lbs
  
• Migdalia (Daughter), 265 lbs
• Melissa (Wife), 233 lbs
  
• Lance (Husband), 365 lbs
• Koli (Cousin), 403 lbs
  
• Sam (Cousin), 372 lbs
• O’Neal (Father), 389 lbs
• Sunshine (Daughter), 275 lbs
• Maria (Mother – White Team), 281 lbs
  
• Michael (Son – White Team), 526 lbs

Speculation that the one of the “Half-Ton” twins was the heaviest player – completely shattered by 40 lbs!  Mamma Mia Michael!  The son of Chicago’s Italian-American duo takes the top honor.

CHALLENGE

The players arrive at the ranch to meet Alison.  (”Smoking hot!” according to Lance.  Who said it in front of his wife!  Oh Lance.  But he’s right, Alison looked fantastic!)  Hugs all around, then Alison brings the contestants up to the gym.  All the equipment is gone!  We know it’s the first of many season surprises.   Alison reveals 22 stationary bikes and announces the first challenge – 26.2 miles on the bike.  Immunity’s at stake, with another twist…the bottom two teams must leave the ranch immediately.   Without even meeting the trainers?!

No product placement yet, another surprise and probably a Biggest Loser first.   The teams hop on the bikes and the feet start flying.  Green Team mother Miggy gets out in front and never lets up.   She is fiercely determined to stay on the ranch.  The Gray Team cousins are a close second.  Neither Koli or Sam can believe how quickly Miggy is cycling.  Everyone’s covered in sweat as Miggy and Migdalia are first to 13 miles.  They rocket all the way to the finish, guaranteeing themselves immunity.   Gray Team finishes second.

The other teams roll through the finish, one by one.   Blue Team mom Cherita suffers extreme stomach pain forcing Dr. H to take her off the bike.  This leaves daughter Victoria biking alone against the other two remaining teams, Yellow and Purple.  The mother/daughter team of Patti and Stephanie squeak out ahead, assuring the Purple Team will stay on the ranch another week.

Blue and Yellow are going home.  Cherita and Victoria knew it would be an uphill battle with mom’s injury, but O’Neal and daughter Sunshine are devasted!   Good thing the limos stuck around.  The two teams load up and prepare to go home, but surprise!  Ninja Jillian and Bob leap out of the bushes.   The teams go home for 30 days.  Yellow gets Bob, Blue gets Jillian – the team losing the highest percentage returns to the ranch.

TRAINER TIP

Bob and Jillian show how easy it is to exercise as a team.  They demonstrate various strength exercises, including plank/leg lifts and toe-to-toe situps with a weighted ball.

FIRST WORKOUT WITH TRAINERS – FI-YYAAAAAAA!

Bob and Jillian pull the fire alarm to get the players out of bed and to the gym.  What a rough wake up call, especially on the first day of certain pain.  As they meet the players and Michael nearly squashes Jillian, the trainers point out the obvious.  The players get bigger and bigger each season.   Bob and Jillian are training together again this season.  Pain, puke, snot and tears commence before the trainers even get ramped up!   Cheryl quickly becomes the gym standout, pounding the mat, screaming like a bad ass with each push.   Everyone’s impressed.  As Jillian says “Somebody wound up the mama and let her spin!”

Wow, first product placement comes 55 minutes in – double Brita and WalMart whammy.

AROUND THE CAMPFIRE

As the first week on campus draws to a close, the contestants tell each other how they gained the weight.  While the specifics differ, the stories sound oddly similar.   Heartbreaking to discover that most of the kids in the parent/child teams have never been in love or even kissed.  Maybe we’ll get more love connections at the ranch this season!  Maria is stuck in the sandwich generation, caring for elderly relatives and raising her kids.  She has little time for herself, another common theme, especially with the mothers.  Koli and Sam saw themselves in Season 7’s Tongan cousins Filipe and Sione.  Koli cried during the makeover episode when he saw Sione’s wife meet him on stage.  He is desperate for love and acceptance.  Migdalia’s husband may be deployed to Iraq again; she’s all her kids have and she’s in terrible health.

LAST CHANCE WORKOUT

Last Chance Workout?  Did someone say Last Chance Workout?! We got another 30 Day Challenge going on…details here.

Back on the ranch, Jillian smirks, “Welcome to the Biggest Loser gym -  family fun for all!”  The contestants get down to business.  Bob reminds them all to input all of their calories and exercise into their bodybugg every day.  Melissa says there’s a lot at stake in the Last Chance Workout.  Patti knows she’s put in the effort but worries that it won’t be enough.   Bob has the twins walking the pool to compensate for their limited mobility, especially James.  He and John are worried about the competition.  As Jillian reminds us,  every day is the Last Chance Workout at the ranch.  You don’t want to end up there, because it’s the last stop, end of the road.

FIRST WEIGH IN

Alison shows off the Biggest Loser scales and reviews the weigh in rules – team that loses the lowest percentage of weight falls below the yellow line.  The rest of the teams will choose which player goes home.

Green Team has immunity, thanks to Miggy’s cycling prowess.

• Miggy, 13 lbs
• Migdalia, 16 lbs
• Koli, 29 lbs
• Sam, 18 lbs
• Daris, 29 lbs
• Cheryl,  14 lbs
• Darrell, 30 lbs
• Drea, 14 lbs
• James, 23 lbs
• John, 23 lbs
• Melissa, 19 lbs
• Lance, 21 lbs
• Patti, 23 lbs (highest % of any female competitor 1st week on ranch)
• Stephanie, 16 lbs
• Ashley, 17 lbs
• Sherry, 21 lbs
• Maria, 13 lbs
• Michael, 34 lbs (most amount lost by any contestant 1st week on ranch)

Holy crap! Michael gets out of the 500s, yelling “are my abs showing?”  Purple Team has the highest percentage of weight loss at 8.09, carried over the top by Patti’s stunning individual loss of 9.4%.  Brown Team falls below the yellow line with a combined percentage of 4.75.  They look alike, weigh almost the same and each lost 23 lbs.  I can’t even tell them apart.  Now the rest of the teams have to send one of the twins home?!

ELIMINATION

Each of the twins argues that the other should remain at the ranch.  Ultimately for the rest of the teams, it comes down to which twin has the time and ability to do it at home.  They choose James.

HOW THE ELIMINATED PLAYER LOOKS NOW

James vows to win the at home prize.   He says that John doesn’t understand what a gift this elimination was for both of them.   Then he says we’ll finally be able to tell the twins apart because he’ll be the more handsome, skinnier twin.   Boy did he make good on that promising, losing 100 lbs in 2 months!  Imagine what John will do at the ranch.

NEXT WEEK

A wild first week!  A total of 5 players sent home.  Public weigh ins before the players even got to the ranch.  Season 8’s Abby Rike blogs this week about the courage it takes to get real with yourself (apparently something that Season 3’s winner – or whiner – Erik Chopin hasn’t mastered yet).  The stakes remain high, while the yellow line stays low.

Coming up…the dreaded week 2 curse.  Which didn’t turn out so bad last season.  Just saying!

Okay, it’s taken me a bit longer to do this recap than I originally promised.  How dare life interfere with my blogging?! :0)

I’ve only been watching The Biggest Loser regularly since Season 3.  (Yes, the only season without Jillian!  I caught up quickly so by the Season 4 premiere, I had a pretty good idea who was on that motorcycle.) And as far as I can remember,  there have been two basic constants throughout the show:  The Week 2 Curse and Weekly Elimination.

WEEK 2

Safe to say that viewers, players and trainers have grown to detest Week 2.  Traditionally, contestants pull double-digit weight loss numbers during Week 1…only to lose single digits, zero weight or in fact gain pounds during Week 2.  So bad enough to have that hanging over their heads.   Week 2 starts with a flashback to what happened after Alexandra was eliminated.  Alison Sweeney tells the team that if they can collectively lose 150 pounds, NO ONE goes home this week.  If they fall short, two people go home.  (Aside from a few Couples episodes, I think Pam and Brian were the only double elimination during Season 3)

Initially, the players are optimistic.  Plus Coach Mo gives them a great pep talk back at the ranch and Julio thanks the group for keeping him for another week.  Then reality starts to sink in.  Tracey is still in the hospital and if she gets out, she’s definitely limited in terms of exercise.  That leaves 15 players, meaning an average of 10 lbs each.  Bob and Jillian are immediately cautious when they hear about the challenge.  My heart sank as I saw all the pictures of previous players losing little or no weight…or worse gaining, like LT did in Season 6.   So the trainers decide to meet the challenge head on by giving everyone critical pointers on the eating front, then beating the crap out of the players in the gym.  They split the group.

Personally, I think one of the reasons that Jillian has always had the winning advantage is that she truly has mastered not only their metabolismsbut also what she calls the universal truth calculation:  calories in vs. calories out.  She explains the ins and outs of what they need to put in their body, when and how much.

Meanwhile, the other group head to the gym with Bob.  Lots of anxiety and stress as they start the workout.  Shay voices what a lot of the others, even the trainers, are noticing.  Julio seems to be slacking off and he doesn’t do himself any favors.  At this point, he should be showing an attitude of gratitude for even being there another week!

Coach Mo gets a chance to visit Tracey, the other part of the Purple Team,  in the hospital.  He is exactly the calming, joyful presence she needed to see.  It’s a little scary to be reminded of what happened during that first day on the beach.  And poor Tracey – she wasn’t sure if she was actually going to join the game again.   But, she gets the clearance to head back to the ranch and put on that purple shirt.  Nice to see her beaming from ear to ear.

CHALLENGE 1

Alison announces that there’s a way to lower the 150 lb number that needs to be lost.  Pop quiz time!  But seriously, who can concentrate when the teacher is none other than Aussie chef Curtis Stone?!  The accent.  The blonde hair and twinkly eyes.  But I digress.  Curtis gives the group a nutritional tutorial on portion control,hidden calories in sugar and usually healthy foods like salad; then if the group answers 5 out of 8 questions correctly, they only have to lose 135 pounds.   I thought the best part of this segment, aside from Curtis, was Sean professing his undying love for soda.  He was drinking 2 liters each day!  Seeing that amount translated into actual sugar was a bit startling.  Yick.

CHALLENGE 2

The team ends up getting the 15 lb advantage, so Alison introduces the next challenge. 20 lbs at stake! Abby made me laugh when she says they KNOW they’re getting wet.   And she was right!  The challenge involved more teamwork, water and a whole lot of balance.  The group had to to cross a baseball diamond-style array of planks over water, with each plank getting narrower.  First plank = 5 lbs off the weight to lose.  Second plank = another 5 lbs.  Third plank = phone calls home!!!  Fourth plank or home base = 10lbs.   Once someone falls, the challenge is over for everyone.

Can you imagine the stress?  No one wants to be that first person in the water.  Clumsy by nature, I can’t picture myself making it past the first plank.   Everyone’s freaking out, but the group hangs together and makes it past the third beam.   They are overjoyed knowing they’ll be able to call home!   Coach Mo reminds them that they’re still not done…10 lbs are still at stake.   Energy still high, the team makes it over the fourth plank.   Only 115 lbs to lose for the week!

REWARD

Emotionally, I find this season to be a constant tug on my heartstrings.  And we’re only in Week 2!  The BL fans on Twitter completely lost it during the family phone calls.  The players are crying, the fans are crying.  Everyone needs Kleenex.  Badly.  Especially when Abby tells her parents she climbed a mountain with two little butterflies alongside her.  These contestants collectively have more pain than we’ve really seen in previous seasons.   They’ve already cried enough tears on the ranch to last a lifetime.

LAST CHANCE WORKOUT

Jillian and Bob pull out all the stops for the last chance workout.  Jillian challenges Rudy to a tug-o-war and can barely keep her footing.  Bob tells us that it’s him and Jillian vs. all of the players, and he jumps in to help Jillian.  Rudy’s blue shirt is drenched, but he emerges victorious against the trainers.  As Jillian says, beating them up  at the gym is a truth serum.  Everything comes out.  Shay dissolves in tears and tells Bob that she hasn’t been happy for 30 years.  3 DECADES!!!  Bob assures her that he’ll help her find her happiness.  He also reminds her not to let the chaos take over.

WEIGH-IN

Finally…time for the weigh-in!  115 is not as hard as 150 but the trainers both think it’s a really difficult goal for week 2.   Pink Team starts.  Rebecca loses 6 and Amanda loses 4…second week in a row.   She’s not thrilled.  Purple Team pulls AMAZING numbers, 10 for Tracey and 9 for Coach Mo, who pulled a 19 all by himself in the first week.  The almost double digits continue with Antoine and Sean.  Red Team loses 19 lbs too!  Green Team Allen and Abby kick it up a notch by losing 22 lbs.  Liz and Danny also lose 22 lbs for the Brown Team.  Holy crap!  Week 3 might end up being the new cursed week if the numbers continue.   Blue team weighs in – Rudy takes off 14 lbs while Dina loses 8.

Next up is Julio!  Everyone’s wondering what his number will be.   The producers are really driving the story this season with clever editing.  The last pre-commercial shot is Antoine mouthing, “shiiiiiii…”  We come back – what a fakeout.  Julio sheds 19 lbs as the sole remaining member of the Black Team!

So the entire team is safe.  With only the Orange Team left to weigh in, the contestants shoot for making the original goal of 150 lbs.   Daniel loses 7 and Shay, an amazing16 lbs, clearly telling Week 2 where to shove it.  :0)

WRAP UP

Summary – a successful obliteration of the Week 2 curse and everyone stays on the ranch!  More strong editing from producers, continuing the emotional rollercoaster and keeping us guessing on the contestants.  Looking ahead, I hope we see more of Liz next week.  She’s the only player I feel we don’t really know all that well.  Of course, I have to ask.  Is that deliberate on the part of the producers?!  Maybe she’s the sleeper, just like Helen on Season 7.

NEXT WEEK ON THE BIGGEST LOSER

Crazy begins anew on Week 3.  The players can choose to train by themselves or with the trainers, with the potential outcome being control of the weigh in.  I can hear Jillian and Bob swearing from here!